TALK TALK TALK

RECOVERY is an ongoing process.

6 ADMITS TO HANDLE RECOVERY

1. We admit, that there is a greater force call Jesus Christ who is in control.
2. We admit that we have made a mess of our lives, only Jesus Christ has a message out of our mess.
3. We take one day at a time to discover freedom, ( freedom allows us to make mistakes,but to move forward from our mistakes.)
4. We admit that we are responsible for ourselves and not the choices of our love ones.
5. We admit that our faith is not based on where we are today, but based on what we believe our future to be.
6. We admit that we sowed the seeds and only God can give us grace and mercy, and a better harvest than we deserve.

Most people think once the addict stop using everything will be like a normal family. What is a normal family?
A normal family, have conflict, and the problem for the family of the addict, most of us learn how not to effectively deal with the conflict, either we  escalate our situations, or we hide from them, fearing if we talk about the problems it will lead the addict to the addiction, and lead us into further co-dependence. this is a NO! NO! We must learn how to properly use our interpersonal skills.

TIPS
1. Listen 
2. Know when to speak and what to say when you speak
3. Do not take everything personal
4. NEVER NEVER GIVE UP

We have been taking 1 night a week for us to discuss how we are feeling about the now and the past it has been helpful. Our children participate in this as well. We are truly a family in healing, we are working on the wounds that have scabbed over, but once you scratch the skin, it bleeds.  We have said it over and over how sorry we are for the things we put them through, AND if need be we will say it again and again, We have made the choice to move from yesterday Lott family. Everyday we get a new beginning to be all we can be. During our meeting, the children and us are allowed to voice our heart, be it  right or wrong. Then we make plans on how to  correct what we can and all those things we can not change we trust God to make the difference Tyrone said he " know that we will have to see him remain free, in order to win over our trust I agree wholeheartedly.
When you have communicated wrong for so many years, know that change will be met with some resistance. but Never Never give up, the process of a seed is not an overnight process, but if properly cared for the seed will produce you desire.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah. The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah. Psalm 46:1-3,7

I want to recommend this website with free information about communication. We will start this series next- week. Share with me your thoughts
.http://www.newconversations.net

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING ?

Well to start our first blog. I want to say we will celebrate 12 years this Sunday ( July 4). We have three handsome sons and if I had to marry Tyrone again, there is only one thing I would change, I would wait on God's timing, other than that he would be the one.  We were talking the other night, how we married out of timing and how it was only God's grace that has kept us together. The challenges that we have faced in our marriage has been more than the drug addiction. We faced our flesh telling us what to do and in realty we obeyed our flesh, and it was costly to us and our children.  Today we are in the process of starting fresh and new. I was thinking about how different our lives have been without the drugs. When you live in a state of off and on turmoil, you sometimes get in the mindset to accept defeat in the simplest form of words We are in the process of 8 months of no drugs in our lives. It has been a day by day trust. A friend of mines ask me How is Tyrone doing I said, so far so good, and she quickly reminded me of my words. She said He is doing fine and will continue to be fine. I  didn't realize  the words I  had spoken so soon, really my words meant maybe today he is good, but I don't know about tomorrow ? Life with an addicted can be so up and down, so, I am learning how to respond with words of hope instead of caution and doubt. It is not always easy,to change what we say, but renewing our minds is a daily must, then we can speak with the truth of God words say about our loveones.
 Don't let your words dictate your future,because of past.
  Romans 12:1-2 Message

  So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.